happy halloween, y'all.

From the smallest Allen who is most excited about trick or treating tonight and stocking up on some candy. Ok, fine, the largest Allen's are excited about the itty bitties stocking up on candy tonight. Happy Halloween, y'all!

biggest and littlest.

Sometimes you forget that you had more beach photos to go through. And those little moments, when you find sweet shots like this are the best. While the middle child may have been completely disagreeable to having his photo taken that night (hey, days at the beach without a nap can be rough!), the oldest obliged and the youngest had no choice. Not the best photos by any means, but the best photos for this mama to look back on.

And yes, Graham ate sand. And Cayden's hands. And Cayden wasn't super-thrilled with that, ha!

graham: first food.

I took a few photos of Graham trying out food for the first time. But y'all, the video, although poor quality, is so much better because you get to see Cayden and Sawyer react to it. And that makes it worth it. First food reactions? I think Graham loves it. His tongue thrust is still pretty strong, but he's slowly figuring it out. This stage is so much fun. New things to discover every day...

puppy.

Every so often, we'll wake up to Cayden walking in our bedroom in the middle of the night. Usually he's either scared of something in his room or complaining of his leg hurting. We try to get him to go back to his room, but sometimes, there's a hint of real fear in his voice and we let him crawl in bed and sleep. I'll admit that sometimes I sleep through these moments. Both of our boys like to go to Jeremy's side of the bed; I think maybe they know I'll make them get back in bed, ha!

Anyway,  I was making up our bed the other morning (as one does when their house is on the market) and found Cayden's puppy hanging out in our bed. My big boys had already left for church, so it was just me and the tiniest Allen still at home. I thought Puppy (as he's called) needed a little time in front of the camera. This sweet pup has been with Cayden since he was born and is so, so loved. And for a split moment, I got all melodramatic thinking about the future and the mornings that we won't find Cayden (or puppy) in bed with us.

And you know what? I think I'll encourage those middle of the night rendezvous for a little bit longer.

a beach weekend.

This past weekend we took a small vacation. Cayden had school off on Monday, so we took advantage of that time. And when one is on vacation, they certainly should not expect the oldest boys to sleep in. In fact, they should expect that they'll wake up even earlier due to excitement. Jeremy took them down to the ocean while everyone else tried to sleep in a bit.

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We weren't entirely sure how all our kiddos would do with the ocean. Cayden and Sawyer have been once before, but Sawyer wasn't even a year old. Thankfully they both loved it. The smallest Allen? Not so much. Hopefully we can give it a try again next year. I should note that he was perfectly happy sitting in laps under umbrellas. So we did at least have that. He was not a fan of the water though.

My mama had the best floppy hat. She was standing right in front of me looking so pretty, so I had to snap a photo. (Notes to self: Self, buy a cute floppy hat. Your nose will appreciate it.)

And, to prove that I was there. Jeremy was testing out the photo settings and I shoved my face right in front of the camera. RIGHT in front of the camera. You're welcome.

letting go of one dream for another.

About a week and a half ago we put our much loved home on the market. We envisioned living here until the boys were in high school – maybe even college. We have enough rooms, the kitchen really couldn't be any fancier and the back yard is the perfect size.

So why are we trying to sell this home that we're completely happy with? Another dream. A dream that's been in the back of my head for oh, about five and a half years. If you're any kind of whiz with math, you'll quickly figure out that our oldest child is almost five and a half years old. And those two things kind of correlate. Because you see, I've wanted to be a stay at home mama.

After every boy we've brought home, I would look at our finances and try to figure out how to make it work. And every time, I'd be so disappointed to see that there was no way to make it work. We let cable go years ago. We could sell a car, but with the hectic schedule of sports and whatnot, only having one car just wasn't going to work for us anymore. So I continued to work, praying all the while that someday, it would work out for us.

We were blessed about a year and a half ago for my mama to watch our kiddos. While not free, it was a much discounted price. And that discounted price kept us comfortable with having a third child and not stressing about finances. In the last few months, some things have changed with that situation and the need to put our children back in full-time daycare was staring us in the face. At the price of close to $1800 a month.

Jeremy and I always said that if sending our kids to childcare ever equaled my paycheck (or close to it), then we would make the decision for me to stay home. Y'all, that decision has come. So while we were thinking me staying at home with the kiddos would look a little differently, God is leading us on a different path. One that still has the same outcome, but it's requiring a little sacrifice on our part.

Which leads to us selling our home. We're trying to lessen our mortgage to keep from stressing over finances. It seems weird to be walking away from a perfectly good job (and income stream) to make this happen. But nothing has ever felt so right.

We've had three showings so far. Of the two that have left feedback, they've said it shows really well. One realtor even went so far as to say that it looks like it's from a Pottery Barn catalog (thanks realtor, but you might be a little crazy). Great feedback, just need to find that one buyer.

Come the end of November I'll be getting my dream. Stay at home mama to some pretty cute little boys. And I can't wait.

eating feet.

Weird little tidbit? I have always wanted a child that would snack on their toes. But only when they're an infant. Because when they get older, that would just be weird. Both Cayden and Sawyer enjoyed their feet. They never actually snacked on them though. Graham? Graham has mastered the technique. And I'm so happy for it. And it's just as cute as I always imagined it would be. I'm guessing since he's still not a super-huge fan of a paci, that this is why he chews on his toes. Or his fingers. Or anything else he can get in his mouth. It'll be cute until he starts walking. Or going to school. And then we might have to put a stop to it.

graham: five months old.

Only about two weeks behind on this update. Good news? Only two weeks to wait before the six month update. #thirdchildproblems

Your months are starting to blend together to me, Graham. The older you get, the more you are starting to look like Cayden. But no worries, your eyes still look like Sawyer's.  It's amazing really, how much the three of you look alike. Personality-wise? The three of you couldn't be more different. And that's awesome and keeps mommy and daddy on their toes every minute of your waking days.

We decided to stop swaddling you sometime this month. One night you were crying and crying. Daddy came in to find you on your belly while swaddled (that's right, you mastered rolling over this month!). You had no arms free to help you flip back over. We figured it was time to stop after that for sure. And you are still sleeping awesome. So, win! Although, it is starting to get a bit chilly at night now. We might have to break out the sleep blankets, but at least you'll have access to your arms.

You are still nursing great, and mommy is still managing to keep up with your demands by pumping at work. You are starting to show a lot of interest in big people food. I imagine we'll start with something like avocado soon. That was both Cayden and Sawyer's first food and it seemed to go over well with them. Mommy is considering trying baby-led weaning with you. We'll see how that goes.

You still love talking. And laughing at Sawyer is still one of your favorite things. Perhaps it's because he's not worried about getting RIGHT in your face to provoke the laughs. We love the way your brothers adore you, and by your eyes, we can see that the feeling is mutual.

Likes: mommy's milk, your brothers, your bouncer, talking, smiling, your feet, riding in your carseat
Dislikes: being overly tired, not being in someone's arms, being fastened into your carseat

weeks eighteen through twenty-one

let's play a game.

It's a game of which kid is this? Because one of our children didn't even know who it was. I ::guess:: we do make the same model over and over. Fun!

But for real, there's no denying our kiddos all resemble each other. And I have a feeling that sometime in the future even I am going to have think really hard about which child I'm looking at. Well, except for Sawyer. Sawyer was born with a head full of hair, so he's easily distinguishable. I'm looking at you, Cayden and Graham. I mean, even down to the knee dimple. It's a little ridiculous, don't you think?